If you don’t know the Rooo...respectfully...

the thinker
The BandThe Bandgetting it together...
this isn’t always the avatar pic but it was just now...so...

...you’re doing Kinja wrong.

Even before yours truly had one of these accounts & thus succeeded in stumbling upon more of the good lady’s output than I’d managed to sift out of the comments elsewhere in the Kinjaverse I knew that it behooved any reader looking for some added value & perspective with whatever was being discussed to scroll a lot slower when that handle showed up.

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Y’all are some funny motherfuckers, for sure - & I loves me some snark on the side with my current events. Hell, I’d even go so far as to say I lap that shit up most days & on some in particular I damn near live for the stuff...it’s one of the better ways I’ve found to keep from going as insane as I all too often find the world around me to be.

Rooo isn’t the only such commenter - awesome (& apparently superhumanly indefatigable) though she undoubtedly is - there are many others & as/when I can persuade them to consent I’d like to build up (for largely self-serving reasons that I humbly submit may be of some value to others besides myself) similar scrapbooks of links to posts of theirs as a means of making it as easy to find this stuff as I wished it had been all that time I spent lurking about the mainpages when I could have been wending my merry way to much more exotic & fascinating neighbourhoods in Kinjatown.

Not only that but our Rooo is in the regular habit of bringing receipts in such copious array that you don’t have to take her word for it...though (again in my opinion) frankly you should do that, too.

Her self-sacrifice in terms of culling pith & moment from the dreck & dross of Twitter alone I would pay real-actual-buy-shit-with-it money for.

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Except I don’t have to.

I just have to passively accept that to see it I have to spend my time (& I use the terms in question advisedly) in a fashion that indirectly provides a revenue stream to at least some individuals I value less...

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I’m not even going to compare the relative degrees of respect. That would be like comparing a living, breathing human being to a piece of plant matter that couldn’t even perform photosynthesis without assistance.

Which I recently learned is a much more significant offence than anyone that’s had so much as one adult conversation in their lives would have any reason to suspect - but that’s all besides the point.

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Which - in case you’ve forgotten - is that more of you (very possibly all of you that I’d actually care to talk to & a pretty decent swathe of the ones I wouldn’t) should be reading the stuff the likes of Rooo are GIVING AWAY because anyone in their Right mind wouldn’t let you anywhere near that kind of work product absent significant remuneration.

By now some of you are saying to yourselves “forget it, Jake - it’s Kinjatown” for one of several reasons.

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We’ll leave the most obvious one off the table, if you don’t mind - Left of Dead is on an entirely different platform if the thing you really wished someone would resurrect was Clashtalk - but a couple of the other available options are worth at least noting.

They aren’t “real” articles by “real” journalists - “if it ain’t onna ‘real’ website I ain’t about to fuck wit it...”

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- to these folks I say this “you do you but I don’t make a habit of taking directions from people I can see with my own two eyes have their head stuck all the way up their own ass...”

They live in havens that it would be a crime against nature to advertise to the trolls who largely remain excluded from them.

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That’s a solid point. Not gonna lie. They’re no myth - in fact the Hydra ain’t got shit on some of those bottom-feeding asshats. The haven thing is true, too.

Some of those sub-blogs are among the most hospitable, interesting & rewarding spots this netizen has ever strayed into. Long may they continue to be so.

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But.

Something I hadn’t cottoned onto until the whole In [shanty-town] Memoriam thing took a left turn at Albuquerque & became a forum of sorts is that the untapped potential of a fully operational mothership in the Kinjaverse is considerably greater than a Lurker’s experience could possibly foretell.

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So - on the basis that I believe it to be possible even while coloring inside the lines - I would be willing to repeat an offer previously made (although on a slightly different basis than before because any assistance I might be able to drum up is likely to remain at a more pronounced remove than was the case in the previous incarnation) to host such material here rather than to cross-post it from such places...or indeed from personal blogs.

Or throw up one of these with at least one link in it so that there’s a place to comment on it where you have been invited to & that doesn’t require you to gatecrash a shared home of many years standing to trample the enjoyment of others...not that you would, necessarily.

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You’re a pretty lovely bunch yourselves but when you travel in any numbers the crap you bring in stuck to your virtual shoes is the reason why in some parts of the world it’s considered polite to leave those at the door.

& if you think I’m blowing smoke or wasting your time you go on ahead & have a read through some of the below.

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If your ass can make it the whole way through even one & not wind up better informed than you were when you clicked through to it then you’re either a much better person than me...or a goddamn liar.

That first one maybe isn’t such a high bar, to be fair.

Though I seriously doubt you cleared it with as much room to spare as this lady:

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